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Does this ever happen to any of you, or am I the only one dumb enough to experience it?

twisty tie, ariel kotker

I feel like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. So I get the bread out of the fridge, undo the twisty tie, take my two pieces of bread out, spread peanut butter on one slice of bread, spread jelly on the other slice, put the peanut butter away, put the jelly back in the fridge, grab the bread bag, twirl it a few times, grab the twis…where did that damn twisty tie go?!? It was JUST sitting here on the counter! WHAT THE HELL?!?

Is it under the microwave? No…

Is it hiding under the edge of the paper plate that my delicious sandwich now sits on? No…

Did it fall on the floor? No…

Did it fall on the floor and somehow get kicked under the dishwasher? No.

SON OF A BITCH, where is the twisty tie??? I want to eat my sandwich!!! How could it just vanish in less than 30 seconds? Did it decide to run away? Did one of the dogs eat it?

I can’t just spin the bag around and tuck the open end under the remaining slices of bread…that won’t seal in the freshness like a twisty tie would. I NEED TO FIND THE TWISTY TIE!!!

Sometimes I find the twisty tie the next day, after I’ve had a chance to sleep on it and start fresh in the morning. Sometimes I don’t find it, and I wonder if it’s living a better life somewhere else, with the rubber bands that fell in the crack between the stove and the counter top.